Ooh, very funny!! It's really good. Now for the inevitable concrit, because for some reason I'm just itching to criticize today (as you'll have noticed if you read my other review, lol).
Firstly, Gollum, not Golem. Secondly, the actions (which you've put in brackets) should go after the colon, not before. Thirdly, 'In descript ranger' didn't quite make sense. Maybe if you put something like 'I'm just a ranger!'. Just some thoughts.
Really sorry about being so critical! You know I love it really...just like I love all of your work. I can't wait for the rest of this!
Author's Response: Ooops...that what happens when you go without coffee I guess. Thanks for the review, I'll change asap! =)