the descriptive prose thus far is excellent, and your depictions of medieval burial methods (following large-scale battle), the environment, and the social/judicial restructuring following the West's victory over Sauron give the first half of thei chapter depth and authenticity. Love it.
Unfortunately, I have to admit that I'm not a fan of Arwen, m'dear, regardless of who writes her. She's just not my cup of teas (too perfect/boring/annoying). And though I love the characterisation of Wormwood, not even your excellent writing skills have the power to sway my opinion on that point, or read her tale further. So sorry!
Might I iffer a tip for the future, though, as one author to another? Elvish vernacular! Awen and Luthilla's dialogue in this chapter struck me as more contemporary American than Middle-earth Westron. And I don't truly believe that Elrond would dissaprove of his beloved daughter's friend simply because she wasn't royal; he's just not elitist/sbobby enough for that.
You don't have a story featuring Wormwood, though, do you? Because - honestly - he is one of the most intriguing OCs I've ever read. You portray his character so vividly that I, as a reader, can't help being drawn to him. Funny how all the cads have 'worm' in their names, isn't it? Wormtongue, Wormtail, Wormwood ...
All the best,
Kara's Aunty ;)
I've only read part-way through the 1st chapter, but had to stop to tell you that you're doing great so far. Wormwood is a total cad, but very interesting with it. A fascinating opening scene with him duping the farmer and his lad (and how dishonourable of him to induce them to steal from the dead). And the backstory with Saruman and Merryweather gives him so much depth. Am very impressed thus far.
Hi Karlmir Stonewain! I don't believe we've met. My name is Irial, pleased to meet you. Now introductions aside allow me to review! So I'm the sort of person who usually reviews chapter by chapter but I've only recently come across this amazing tale and found that I could hardly wait for the next chapter to stop and review so I thought I'd wait to the end. Four hours straight and here we are! And I must say, the characters, the plots, the twists and turns and everything about this tale was... well you know what I don't think there's even a word for how good it was. I could sit here like a thesaurus and list them all but suffice it to say; I LOVE your work. Excellent. If I had a glass I'd be raising it with a very pompous 'Hear hear, jolly good work'. But I don't. And I'm an Aussie so you get 'Top job mate, and keep it coming!' :D
Author's Response: Thank you very much, Irial. It was very refreshing to get a review for this story immediately after I resumed work on it. Please feel free to look at my bio page and my other stories, essays and poetry. I would also appreciate your correspondence.
Achapter here and there is the way I've been reading your wonderous Arwen's Journey, But that will not do, It is going to be my late summer reading and deserves full attention. I have always admired your style of writing and completely enjoyed your short stories. I know I will enjoy this also. Thank you so much for sharing your gift.
Author's Response: Thank you, Lisse. As you go through the chapters, you may notice a few original characters who appear in my other stories. I set this novella aside quite a while ago to work on shorter stories and also because of health issues. I hope to resume working on it this fall or winter, depending on how my muse moves me.
I truly enjoy your style of writing. You have a woderful way of describing surroundings and atmosphere so that I feel like I am transported to Middle Earth. Some of the geography is a bit beyond me, so I have decided to go and buy the LOTR books tomorrow.
Author's Response: Thanks, Ellenflower. My intent is to give my readers the impression that they're seeing each scene on the "movie screens" of their imaginations. The books I reference most often are Karen Fonstad's The Atlas of Middle Earth and Robert Foster's The Complete Guide to Middle Earth. You can obtain good used copies of these books at reasonable prices through Amazon.com
Summer is a bad time for me to write because I have so many projects to work on around my property. If I'm not working on stone walls or cutting firewood, I'm doing carpentry projects or rearing silk moth caterpillars. Hopefully, I'll have another chapter posted by the end of the month.
Your story has an exciting plot, certainly. I enjoyed reading this very much. The characterization is also very good, I especially liked the villains, for some reason. Only I don't like your depiction of Faramir. He was such a paragon of virtue in LotR that maybe he needed a little more realistic treatment, but I just can't picture him to be adulterous and violent. It just does not suit at all to Faramir (at least as I have used to see him). But otherwise you have done excellent job. I look forward to reading the rest of the story.
Author's Response: Thank you, Formegil. I'm glad you're enjoying the story, so far. Summer is a rather busy time for me, but I hope to have another chapter posted before the middle of July.
You are quite correct about Faramir. Normally, he would be virtuous and faithful toward Eowyn. However, if you read Arwen's furtive conversation with Lothiriel as she departs Meduseld (Ch. 32), you will get a clue as to why Faramir has taken the intriguing Gwynneth as his mistress. Linner Wormwood is not the only one practicing the Black Arts in this story.
Eowyn's dilemma is only one of the subplots in the book which will be developed and resolved as the tale goes on. I know I probably should have saved it for a separate short story, but sometimes my characters seem to take over the plot all by themselves. An author sometimes has to write as his muse whispers to him.
I very much enjoyed reading this tale. You write very well!
Author's Response: Thanks very much for your review. I already have a follow-up short story nearly finished, based on this book. Sorry, I can't say what it's about, because it will spoil the surprise. I'm also working on the outline for a second, also based on this book, which will be a murder mystery set in Rohan. As for my writing style--I'm heavily influenced by Robert E. Howard. I usually act out the scenes before putting them down on paper. I've had to rewrite a number of scenes about a dozen times to get them right. Fan fiction is anything but boring, especially when it's a labor of love.
Only been reading the reviews, but am interested in marriage rpoblems! Am now beetling off to read this!
Author's Response: Thank you for your attention. Eowyn and Faramir's marriage problems will not be introduced to the story for several more chapters, but please read on.
I'm really enjoying this, good job!
Author's Response: Thanks for the review. There will also be two subplots: The relationship between Evenstar's handmaidens, and problems in the marriage of Eowyn and Faramir.